The Christmas Blues

[Vahene]

Okay, confession time. It isn't that I don't like the holiday season - I
mean, I'm supposed to, I think, since my birthday is Dec 26th. But, that
doesn't stop me from feeling the blues every time Thanksgiving turns
around the corner. After Christmas it takes me weeks to get back to my
normal, semi-perky self because the holidays just drain me.

I look at the Christmas lights and they make me furious. The songs on
my favorite radio station turned to holiday music since the week BEFORE
Thanksgiving, again, enraging me and forcing me to find other stations to
listen to. Now, you might think I have anger management issues, but this
only happens around the holidays. Only then do I feel this overwhelming
urge to just tell the world to go screw itself. Tempers flare, depression
sets in because of the time of year.

I can't be the only one who feels like this. If you do get seasonal
depression, how do you deal with it? Especially those of you that might be
like me, and as a kid had a huge family, but now that you're older... well,
people die, and people spread out to other parts of the country... you
know how it is. I'm not alone, thankfully my parents are divorced, but it
doesn't fail that I have a problem figuring out how to deal with this.

Any suggestions?

K

[blackheart]

I get the SAD real bad. It's not necessarily the holidays though, as I do like Christmas and have positive associations with it. It's really the worst in January and February. I don't start feeling human again until March/April or a week in the Caribbean or something.

Dunno where you live, but for me the weather and the darkness is a big factor. My prescription would be:

* Spend the holidays with close friends and by all means do something FUN. Get out of the house, go skiing, or head down to Antigua.
* Take Vitamin D, you don't get enough sunlight in winter
* Ideally take a nice warm-weather trip right in January
* Keep active, I find Nov/Dec is a great time to get serious in the gym -- It's empty at this time of year, you're less active due to the weather. It has certain mood-improving effects, for me at least.
* It's the end of the year, time to forget about the rough times and focus on your plans for the year ahead. I spend a lot of time updating my resume, writing reviews, making plans/resolutions for the coming year -- just stupid stuff sometimes like "take a sailing lesson," "learn mandarin," "visit italy," whatever.
* Simple, but don't dwell on the stuff that brings you down. I know people who just play bad experiences, fears, hates over and over and over again in their minds, making them more and more vivid each time. No wonder they feel bad!

[Mon-da-oth]

I would get like this often times when around my birthday and any holidays where people would be nice to me. I would get angry and just down right mean. It wasn't until I realized the pattern and had to sit and just wonder why I reacted like I did in these situations.

What it boiled down to was people being nice to me. I didn't feel I deserved the kindness and attention that was being heaped on me and was being overwhelmed by it. I have a low self esteem and a bit of an inferiority complex. Once I accepted that, things got nicer for those being nice to me.

[The Explorer]

My answers won't be the most helpful but.

Normally I havn't spend Xmas with my family for the past 11 years except we were and still are in the same country this year so I will be visiting them for the 2nd Xmas in a row @#~}{.

I never look forward to Xmas, I always look forward to NYE, I normally try to avoid the sharade of xmas, but will get drunk with friends weekend pre NYE, I'd normally have Xmas meal with friends then work for treble pay at some job or other Xmas Eve night and Xmas Night, if not working then I am drunk. Last Xmas was really weird for me as had to stay "normal" whilst I spent the week with my family.

But Basically; if you don't like it meet up with friends, definitly do anything that makes you laugh and generally avoid the thing that activates your inner warlock.

Blackheart maybe right about taking a trip but vacation time = chaos = kids= chaos = airport madness = choas = I think you get the picture.

Mind you I am not looking forward to turning 30 in February either but my different groups of friends say they are going to take me out and get me slaughtered, which I figured would keep me drunk from the 1st to the 29 of february, so there is no way in hell I will actually remember my 30th which also means I will only be sober after recovering from 1st weekend in Jan to the first week of feb. I wouldn't recommend being me to anyone else!!

[Maevan2]

Mind you I am not looking forward to turning 30 in February either but my different groups of friends say they are going to take me out and get me slaughtered, which I figured would keep me drunk from the 1st to the 29 of february, so there is no way in hell I will actually remember my 30th which also means I will only be sober after recovering from 1st weekend in Jan to the first week of feb. I wouldn't recommend being me to anyone else!!

I can tell you one thing: once you'll be sober again you'll realize that nothing has changed and that you are still the same. Just don't start worrying that you are moving towards 40 and you'll be fine

[Kell]

Only then do I feel this overwhelming
urge to just tell the world to go screw itself.

I have that urge at least once a day. And it makes my life a lot easier.

I don't have any of these problems. I like having time off, I like people being nice to me and I like being nice to other people, so I'm probably not going to be very helpful here.

All I -do- try to say is; take things as they come. Enjoy whatever comes to you, because you had it coming. Also; fear everything that is coming to you, because you had it coming.

If people are nice to you, it's probably because a. you've got authority or b. you're a nice person too and deserve people being nice to you.

If it's a. you've got a problem unless you're a shallow and heartless bastard. In which case; enjoy, because you have what you wanted.

Eh.

Enjoy the holidays. 'Cause this years holiday is the last one of your current life. We never know what it's going to be like next year. And really; everybody has things to worry about. And if we'd all do that, this world would be one disappointing, little, rotten, black place.

To all of us.

Really; take some acid. Or pills. And I'm not saying that because I'm dutch. I'm saying that, because it makes you appreciate the smaller things in life, and you loose focus on the things that really don't matter.

[Kell]

Okay maybe I need to elaborate on my shameless advertising on drugs there.

People take -all- prescription drugs they can, just to feel happy, because they are missing out on something.

Now -that- seems rediculous to me, too. Because it only surpresses the feeling of needing, it doesn't take away the cause.

And yeah, maybe acids or pills wont help you any further. But. They wont surpress your feelings. And they will make you see a whole different side on things, hopefully.

Prescription drugs, antidepressives, anything like that; rubbish. Solve the issue, rather then surpressing it. Because just because you don't feel it, doesn't mean the problem is going away.

Find out why it is you don't like it? You can't make it go away, but you can learn to live with it.

It's like.. women are using PMS as an actual excuse to be horrible to loved ones? Oh come -ON- people. It's a reason, not an excuse. And if you know the reason you can get over yourself and become a better person.

So yeah, basicly what Mon was saying, hihi.

[Kell]

i love the sound of my voice, don't I...

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYBODY! MORE WINE!

[Stormknife]

MORE WINE!

You take the wine. I'll take the whiskey. More for both of us.

[Vahene]

Heh, the only drugs I take are asprin .. and only that instead of ibuprofin
because its better for your heart.. and only when something hurts.

You can keep the liquor though.

I don't really drink. (I don't count 1 drink on my birthday, once a year,
and even then, I don't drive). Speaking of which, the b-day dinner is
tomorrow night. Yum... Carrabba's...

Thanks for all of the suggestions. I'll read the list later and pick out some
of the more do-able-for-me options.

K

[Kell]

I don't really drink.

Maybe you should. Sometimes it's good to become half drunk, noisy and obnoxious to get things out of your system.

Don't do it as a habit tho.

Happy b'day =)

[Mon-da-oth]

I don't really drink.

Maybe you should. Sometimes it's good to become half drunk, noisy and obnoxious to get things out of your system.

Don't do it as a habit tho.

Happy b'day =)

Not everyone that gets drunk is noisy and obnoxious. I get a little quieter (as if I ever though that possible) but am quicker to be blunt when someone does or says something stupid.

[broncoblitz]

Will someone give me a freaking medal for not jumping all over this topic?

[Black Hand Enclave]

Will someone give me a freaking medal for not jumping all over this topic?

Noted and the Purple Heart is in the mail.

[Vahene]

I thought someone bribed him?

This is a serious issue though, so if you can't be an adult when you reply
and actualy adhere to the forum rules - don't bother replying because
there was a purpose I posed this topic and question. Thank you to
everyone who has seriously replied to the topic... I appreciate it. A lot.

K